A New Home (part 6)

Felicity felt a little dazed with all that had happened. She’d never really told anyone about her life before. She’d never really had a friend like him to tell it to anyway. After pacing around the house for a while, she stopped in the kitchen and noticed the time. Feeling a new sense of dread, she realized her father would be home any minute. Then with a panicked jolt she remembered that she hadn’t started dinner. Just then she heard his truck. Sending up a quick but fervent prayer she stood right where she was. He breezed in the door and without so much as a glance at her, he simply said “I ate out with a friend”. With that he went to his room and shut the door. The feelings of being invisible that she normally despised, felt like a blessing tonight. She exhaled a grateful breath and turned to go up to her room.

  

She entered her room and turned on the lamp beside her bed. She moved towards the bathroom but paused in front of the mirror on her vanity. Standing still and looking at her reflection she began envisioning herself in a beautiful long evening gown, maybe in pink, definitely sparkly and fitting her perfectly. She imagined her black wavy hair swept up into a fancy up-do. She would put the combs from her great-grandmother in her hair. She looked down at them now and picked one up and ran her fingers over the delicate details of the treasured item. Scooping one side of her hair back, she secured the comb there and turned her head to admire how it looked. It was pretty and it stood out with glistening proudness against her dark hair. Felicity noticed then that she was smiling. She could almost see the dress on her and her soft make-up as she completed the look by fastening on the one and only item she had of her mothers.

Turning to her dresser, she opened the top drawer. Lifting a few items and retrieving a small box, she closed the drawer and went back to the vanity. She sat on the bench and gazed at the black velvet box in her hand. She slowly opened it. Two glittering diamond studs with tiny tear drop gems dangling from them stared back at her. She took them out and secured them on her ears. The earrings her mother wore when she married her father looked like they were crying for the loss that took place years after these had been worn. Though her heart carried pain at her mother’s absence, she cherished these earrings and kept them tucked safely away. Felicity had a mingling of tears and a smile at what had been and what might be. Her smile faded when she came to her senses at the thought of her father destroying her Cinderella fantasy of going to the ball with her prince.

  

Putting her treasured items back where they belonged, she readied herself for bed. She hoped she would at least dream of going to prom with Roger so she could pretend it was a memory. Pulling the covers up and turning out the lamp, she thought of Roger. Her feelings for him were growing and she didn’t know what to do about that. Felicity drifted off to sleep with tears still resting on her lashes.

  

When she got to school the next day, Roger was waiting for her at her locker. “Good morning Felicity!” He said, cheerfully. She gave him a half-hearted smile and replied “Good morning.” “How’s your Dad?” He asked, unexpectedly. She blinked at him “My Dad? Um ok I guess,” she answered a little stunned. No one asked how her dad was doing. But then no one really knew that much about her or her dad to ask. “I was thinking I might come over after school and ask him about taking you to prom.” She honestly had no idea how to answer that. She wanted to hope that it would work but even if it did she just couldn’t bear telling Roger that she could never afford a dress. “Oh… well… can I let you know at the end of the school day?” she was hoping to buy a little more time to think this threw. “Sure,” he said, without hesitation.

  

Felicity went through the day with a distracted mind and for some reason all she heard the girls talking about that day was prom. At lunch the whole table of girls she was sitting behind were giggling and telling each other about their dresses and shoes. Other girls in the halls were talking about when and where they were getting their hair done. It was so difficult to hear. The last hour of the day arrived and she knew Roger would be wanting an answer so he could come ask her father’s permission. The class went far too quickly. When they reached the hall, Roger approached her and said “Well, have you decided if you’re going to be brave enough to let me ask your dad?” Something about how he asked that made her think for a second. Was she going to be brave enough? Before she could stop herself, she blurted “Sure.” Oh no! What had she just done? How would she tell him she couldn’t afford a dress even if her dad said yes? She felt a little sick. ”Roger…” she began but he interrupted, “you already said yes! No going back now.”

They were on their way to her house and talking about nothing in particular. As they started up her driveway, she saw that her father was already home. She stopped short and Roger knew she was nervous. “it’s gonna be ok Felicity,” he soothed. Paralyzed of speech, she could say nothing to stop him. They stepped up onto the front porch and Roger knocked. Her father opened the door with some surprise. Felicity stood slightly behind Roger and looked into her father’s face with pleading eyes. “Did you forget your key again Felicity?” Her father asked with a touch of annoyance lacing the edge of his question. “No sir, I asked Felicity if I could speak with you today. My name is Roger… Roger Wilkins sir,” he said, extending his hand and having no nervousness in his voice. She envied him. “Why?” her father all but snapped back but accepting his hand in greeting “I have something I’d like to ask your permission for, sir,” Roger said in a firm statement. Her father looked at her with questioning eyes. “Come in.” he said stepping aside. Felicity never left Roger’s side and sat beside him on the couch across from her dad in his chair.

  

Clearing his voice, Roger said “As you might already know sir, I’ve been walking Felicity home for quite some time now,” Roger said to break the ice. “Mmmhmm,” her dad replied. “Well sir, I’ve come to know your daughter and have a tremendous amount of respect for her.” Her father remained silent. “Um, sir I would be honored if you would allow Felicity to attend prom escorted by me.” Roger asked. To her utter embarrassment, her father burst out laughing. A little taken-a-back, Roger looked at Felicity and saw that she had tears forming in her eyes and redness on her cheeks. After a minute her father collected himself and said “Son I don’t know what background you come from, but people like Felicity and me have to work for what we need and there’s nothin’ left to spend on foolishness like prom dresses and shoes. Not to mention fancy hair-do’s and all the other nonsense,” her dad said all the while chuckling. Felicity could see that Roger didn’t know how to respond to that. The problem was she didn’t know how to either to rescue him.

  

“So does that mean I don’t have your permission?” Roger asked. “It ain’t a matter of my permission, didn’t you hear what I said about our life?” her father replied. “Yes sir, I sure did. Let me assure you that my family has had to work for everything we have.” He countered. “But I want to know if you would have let her go with me if that was all she needed… your permission?” Roger asked again.

  

“Well if Felicity wants to go in her best jeans then she has my permission.” Her father said laughing again. With that, he got up out of his chair and said “Well thanks for stoppin’ by. Now Felicity needs to get to the chores and dinner.” Her father said and exited the room. Felicity sat expressionless. “Thank you for trying.” She said flatly. She pushed herself up and walked to the front door. Roger sat for a moment more, then got up. He walked to the door and stopped in front of her. She couldn’t bear to look up at him. She had never been so humiliated. “I’ll see ya tomorrow, Roger,” she said in a voice not much more than a whisper. His heart just broke for her. He took her face in both his hands and lifted it to meet his gaze. He said nothing, just looked into her hollow eyes. Tears were ready to spill over. One fell from her eye and he wiped it away with his thumb for a second time. “See ya tomorrow.” He finally said. He left and she closed the door without a sound behind him. She did her chores, made dinner, and finished her homework. She fell into bed… empty.

  

Felicity had no strength to rise and meet another day after what happened yesterday. She decided she was going to stay home from school and rest. After her father left for work she decided to draw herself a bath and relax for a while. She had the whole day to herself. She read, took a short nap, and made herself some soup.  She had put together Some chili for dinner so it would be ready when her dad got home. To her surprise someone knocked on the door. Putting her soup aside, she went to open the door. Roger stood on the porch. He was holding pink roses and something else. Her mouth fell open and she gasped.